Euphoria Equinox
“This is what the fearful do: when a burning star torments them, they go to the sea.
”
Write into oblivion: I am I am. This is the mirror of fire. This is how you survive. The brutality of coming spring: that I was still here witnessing.
Tell me this is a daydream
God forgot me in the equinox
My escape delayed by the oblivions I wrought
The abandonments
Dreams of flight! arriving in the surplus midnights!
God forgot me in the bewilderments
I exist I exist
I was this hidden Atlantis
Madonna cycling through the abysses
I exist, I exist
another midnight I resigned
delaying extinction
Madonna the hierophant of oblivion
what a great bounty this life awakening
in the euphoria equinox
surviving these ages of decadence
The abandonments I was awakening
digging my graves in the daylight
a great and terrible beauty awakened
surviving these ages of decadence
You betray the valley of darkness
When you wake the shadows
You betray the valley of darkness
You betray the daydreams
When you walk across the shadows like Madonna of the tightropes
Beneath the blossoms of blooming fires
I was forgotten in that wilderness
Smoking beneath the clouds
You anointed by violence
A hydra in the wilderness
Can you imagine
Smoking beneath the clouds
Me anointed by violence
Can you imagine
A mosaic of daydreams
This was my new year’s anthem
Caverns lived in my hollows
The dreams straying from me
I walked into flames
The fragility!
I was anointed by the violence of a daydream
I exist what sick violences I can't forgive this life awakening like the opening of a blade in my veins
what violence allowed this violence?
I exist I exist
Voyager over so many tomorrows
Dying by the divine
Chandeliers of morning light
Poison me not vice
I died twice once for the divine once for appetite
I died for this Genesis
Icarus with lightning in his wings
Katabasis the lambs died for this
Witness the growing wound of my body
Creations flaming about my fingertips
Katabasis I witnessed light rising from the dead
And they were my dark creations
Like a fever dream this existence
In the heat caverns of my throat
The oblivions I chose rising from the dust
what a great and terrible beauty I awakened
What a great and terrible beauty I lamented
Burning with eviscerate sunrise I evaporated by dawn like a dream
Nothing could save us
Lamb guardians at the gate
Of my blood it awakened
The immortal’s mistake
Finite and at the edge of creation
Save me heart of fire
Would you witness this eternity of violences?
King of neon voids
That Eucharist euphoria I escaped
The fallen were a breeze in the waiting and wasting void
Anointed by the violence
Can you imagine?
Caverns in my throat from smoke
These were the oblivions I chose
Trafficked dawn
How decadent this apocalypse
I had forgotten I was abandoned in this infinite wilderness
and I vanished
I vanished into mist—
Of my blood and broken you were
Immaculate stars, make me storms across the dreaming Earth
There is divinity in void
This ruin of cities shamed by the starlight
black rains across the darknesses I dream of death’s dark skeins
or the bright eyelids of God’s opened eyes
I watch the darkness rehearse its paradise
Madonna of the vast plains
Madonna of the teeming seas
beyond flaming Babylon in embers
in the Beginning was Being
sieged by the high heavens
Being like colliding universes
this bridle Being I wanted to escape salvation
Madonna bridegroom of the cloudbanks
we were foreigners of the midnight
and I vanished—
I vanished into the twilights
Love this striking violence
I waited for you in that vastness!
darkness across idle Paradise
I wander in wild worship across the dreaming Earth
reverie and revelation, I watch my life in reverse
the injuries of mirrors: beware the angels’ radiance
god the sorrows broke me down into holiness
Screaming sirens dissipating with the night winds
You anointed by the violence
My soul resists containment
I want I want it was beating in my fragile cathedral heart
The cacophony!
Like wings in a whirlwind
another sunrise to survive
diviner of the night, which vice will fix my life?
This wild magic I survived
and I vanished—
I vanished into that vast wilderness
