Irreducible

I was terrified of the things waiting for me 
The illusions were disappearing 
Killing me in a sequence of silences
Everything was rushing
It was too much for me
Firefalling like Yosemite 
Around the clock 
Tearing off flower petals  
I wish I could stop 
Wanting to possess beauty 
The fragility annihilating me every eve 
I grieved I grieved
Then I melted to eternity 
The spectacles 
Winnowing me 
Into singularity 
Accumulated light 
From the floods of daytime 
Limbs of light peeling my sleeping eyelids 
Wayless like the breaking days  
I couldn't survive the pillars of creation 
I was traveling sargasso seas
When the spectacles witnessed me 
Spawning sun in the dark stations of night
I was a newborn babe
With an inquiring gaze
Before the shockwaves
I flamed amazement  
Vanishing into territories of mist
I admit jealousy of infinity's edgelessness  
The Earth owes me nothing 
And still I wanted 
A cloud creature fearing descent
I made a transaction with the darkness 
Blossoming moon glow swallowing me whole 
A funeral for the planet 
I was at the wake 
For the vanishings
And I prayed
That the flowering jasmine spring 
Hadn't missed me 
I was a sorcerer
Classifying the fires 
Like an archivist of light 
I saw Carthage destroyed 
And I wanted more 
A Valkyrie of the warlights in succession
Like a rich man needling through the eyes of heaven 
I wanted impossible things to happen to me
Slumbering in the fever-furnaces of dream
It was existence like a leech that desiccated me 
I would not betray the sound and fury 
Epiphanies from the tempest 
And yes we were sleepless 
I was a gilded firebird on that horizon 
I would inject my blood
Into the veins of earth
Spin light with the Spinners 
Bear witness to that disaster 
Carthage was history 
I was a jewel of the earth
Before the grief reduced me 
Endowed with reason and I wanted to give it up
Siren of the night
Grief reduced me 
I was a bride of the disaster
The light was spinning
And I wanted it to Go! Faster! 
I was a silhouette of the sun 
Demons from the deep drumming 
Like a refugee of fire 
I was consumed by wounds 
A history of my being
And it was annihilation 
I saw the ocean surfacing in barricades of waves 
Like the last gleaming rays of day
And I needed mirages sustaining me 
It was too much 
Time like a scimitar 
A traitor even to idleness 
I was in the dust with the locusts 
Sleeping away eternity 
Reduced by grief
I would not betray the sound and fury
Epiphanies from the tempest 
And yes we were sleepless