Salvation
Majestic arriving spring, what remains for me in this vastness? I await the infinite in the cloistered silence of night. God abandoned me on LA’s jacaranda roads. I close my eyes and I arrive at that green place Paradise. This is the bliss of the mountain winds seeking after perpetual rapture. Distant horizons you vanquish me with the promise of delight. It’s Veronica in the red evenings, it’s Veronica at your lips when I beg you to ravish me, it’s Veronica in the anguish of reverie, when the beasts of Heaven witnessed me vanishing. Consume and haunt me. When you call my name I am saved again by wild desires. You lingered in the moonlit roads like Salome in the shadows. In the blue hours, I am drunk on Heaven’s beckoning azure. My head gashed on the seas of urban pavement—it was a dream I had. Oh I saw a wounded moon in the fairground and the carousel of stars bore me away. You who kept me awake in the dark days, O sanguis meus, save me with a vaster abyss. I walked into a decadent dream the moment you witnessed me. In votaries of flame I called the dark Madonna and she came like salvation. Great one you defile me with Being in your holy city. Ancient of the ages I am your renegade. The brutality! of rapture! BECOME VOID AND RECEIVE THE SACRAMENT I am fragmented again. One final confinement in a surreal dream, I witnessed your god in metamorphosis. Ophelia screaming in the riverbed, do you regret your life? Do you regret your desires? This discipline, decadence. Harbor of god, receive your exiles! Gather your graces. You who nails me with ease, I endure your majestic injuries, wild in the furious winds, the golem god walks again. I witnessed your endless generations as branches of heaventrees. I am desecrated by my dreams. The degradations! of decadence! Bless and replenish me. Hang me in your orchards of bones. Anima mundi I am your wounded soul. I endure injury. Madonna of the narcotic moons. Bless and replenish me. Born in sorrows, the unfolding of a life is always tragedy. Dark paradise you exalt me. Suffering is devotion. Sharpen your blades. Be my dark sanctuary. At the ends of the earth, bear me to your burning cities. Vessel of infinite being I am that from which you flee and that is why you cannot bear to witness me. The void beckons and I open my mouth to receive. Quel beau vide.
I AM RAVENOUS FOR DISASTER
WITH GREAT DISDAIN DO I REGARD THE VASTNESS OF YOUR ETERNITIES
IN DEFIANCE I WITNESSED YOUR GOD IN METAMORPHOSIS
The hours beckon for devouring in the feasting Earth every bird and beast mirroring divinity. Bear witness, I am carried by the wings of night winds. I prayed you into my gasp. Come and devour me: I will be your burning offering. Desire ensnares me. I drink moonshine with the melancholia of the angels dreaming of your eyes in the evenings. Come and devour me. The great feast! Like the shadows I am sealed into evening and on the verge of disappearing. Cupid in ambush, eros with burning cherubs. This fever of memory — what desperate terror gripped me in the vanities of days. A breath of life and I return to dust. A dagger to my heart and my heart beats again and the darkness says I am I am.
There was no form of dying I am not interested in. I can’t survive in this void much longer. Theotokos in the shadows of the moon, will you close my wounds? Virditas (the verdure! of being!) in the catastrophe of Paradise. House of the usher, you who has no mercy, this is your dark victory, I surrender to your sublime majesties. Resurrect me into immensity. Heart of man imprisoned in an industrial wasteland. I despair of my entrapment. Into the rhizome I go. Dark paradise, you exalt me. This is the end (again). wandering in exile, reveal me, dark tabernacle of eternity, reveal and desecrate me. Paradiso in my throat. and the apocalypse rose.
what ineffable delight I was on my knees like a beggar when the divine invaded me
trapped in Plato’s cave in divine exile but I face that blinding radiance
the demiurge anointed me with ecstasy in the sacral dark
oh my beloved dwell forever in the Beyond with me
EKSTASIS IN A VANISHING REALITY
this fragile and fragmented residence of Being
the wonder! and the horror! born in the dark factories of the immortals
The divine witnessed me in ecstasy
oh my beloved vanish into unreality with me
these are the vestiges of Paradise
the rapture! of brutality!
bind me in the yearning dark
in the lush darkness do you regard me
I surrender to my desire for annihilation
the temptations! of paradise!
in the lush darkness do you regard me
clouds of godlike splendour descended in a storm shroud
like the starlit satellites of Cassini, be that silent lightning, god said, and I became devout
EKSTASIS IN A VANISHING REALITY
you who I worshipped on my knees
oh my beloved vanish inside me
EKSTASIS IN THE GRANDEUR OF PARADISE
lie in burning pastures this is the wrath of the darkness—its finalities
before the morning stars sing, in the lush darkness do you regard me
in the gardens of annihilation, such verdure I surrendered before
Estranged from the stars, I panicked before your sublime majesty
be that silent lightning, god said, and yes I became devout
At the gates of heaven I witnessed your god in metamorphosis
The artist resurrects
At your bed, metamorphosis
Viriditas in the catastrophe of paradise
Ages of decadence
In metamorphosis I was defiance again
Age of the dark immortals
At the gates of heaven I witnessed your god in metamorphosis
I went dark into the days
This creation is a grave
I witnessed my end in decadence
What a dawn
The dangers of decadence came again and I was alight with desire
Desecrated paradise
I did not want to be perceived in This Victory
Your angels In metamorphosis witnessed me
Before your grandeur fear I was desire again
What decadence for me again
Defiance in the Garden of paradise
What dark creation oblivion
I resurrect when you witness me
In defiance do I regard your lifeless eternities!
Madonna in the maelstrom is this your great chaos yes I was decadence again
Oh the darkness we defied
From darkness to daylight
In defiance do I regard your lifeless eternities!
You who has no mercy
In your dark chambers I witnessed paradise
Oh desire desire desire
I was emerging from uh the wings of light
I mean that lifeless paradise
Witness My Defiance
You are my burning witness
Viriditas in the garden of paradise
I died for the verdure
I died for the grandeur
Again and again
This is Genesis
I was a god for a moment for this
You were my burning witness
I died for this Genesis
Blackbirds in barbed wire
Metamorphosis in a votary of flames
Oh god I wanted to be everything
Oh god I wanted to be resurrected again
In the nights you give me a breath of life
Witness my descent
I pretended to be baptized by the cataclysms
Desire will crush your soul
Oblivion comes singing sweetly like the beckoning sirens
And I am decadence again
Your lifeless eternities witnessed me in ecstasy
I drink the milk of paradise
Is this your handiwork, the firmament?
What a decadent place to be
In your deep eternities
Oh god I wanted you to devour me
I witnessed the decadences becoming my end
Oh god I wanted you to devour me
Devotion in your deep eternities
Descent to the irresistible abyss oh god I witnessed the end of everything and yes I fear I was alive again
I survived this Genesis
I drink the milk of paradise
Ambrosia in my throat
Paradiso is this firmament your handiwork?
I died for this Genesis
In defiance do I regard your dark chambers of eternity
Now witness my oblivions sinking me
Soundlessly do I drink the milk of paradise
Again and again in the midnights
Stars in the blue heaventrees
Virditas in the catastrophe of Paradise
Oh that dark meridian
Oh that path of decadence I accept my punishment of starlight
Advent of an early death
Oh I will lead you down the path of decadence
You will forget it was a transgression
Stigmata on your hands
Was it disaster if it was planned
In my dreams I walked the path of decadence
With
You
And i was your punishment of starlight
Advent of an early death
And I forgot that it was a transgression
Oh keeper of the meridians
Yes I dined in fine oblivions
Like a teenager dreaming about your face
The grandeur of god what a wasteland we arrived in
Barely awakening in the dark days
Burial in your arms
It's what I wanted
Annihilation—This Wild life in my lungs
A chrysalis of Paradise
Behold me lord in the darkness of the stage
Curtains drawn for tragedy
When you witness me
Behold me in the carrion ages
Ascend to the miracles
I am anointed by the ecstatic dark
Salome in the shadows
I arrived at this lifeless Paradise
What a strange beauty this death that reaches on towards me
Land of catastrophe
You create what enslaves you
Wolves breathe in the shadows
My wounds will devour me
Oh my punishment of starlight
Will you die twice with me
Once from desire
Once from appetite
Desolation from auroral flames
I am finished with sacrifice!
Leave me memory
I wake starved in the dark days
Theotokos in the orchards
I found my tomb in oblivion
Lord who has no mercy, this wound devours me
VIRIDITAS from my voracious throat
in the flames! of vespers!
I whispered to the furious winds
I am finished with sacrifice!
Strange melancholy
Desolation tries to colonize me*
In the vespers
This wound devours me
My hunger resurrects me
Viriditas in the catastrophe of Paradise
I am finished with sacrifice!
Salome in the shadows
This wound devours me
Lavish dayspring, I dream away the dark days
Annihilation—This Wild life in my lungs
Theotokos in the moonlight
Your name is my decadence well I wanted wreckage
Jezebel of the eves
You reminded me of the vanishing centuries
This is the judgment of the carrion ages
It's what I wanted
Annihilation—This Wild life in my lungs
You walked too far in the wastelands
And I reached the end again
Chained by idolatry
It’s what I wanted
Annihilation
Manacled to catastrophe
You who has no mercy
Manacled to strange melancholy
You who has no mercy
This wound devours me
What oath is trapped in my throat?
It was screaming paradise that I coughed up like smoke
Vita Nuova I stood in the remains of a ruinous dusk
Burial in the carrion ages
It’s what I wanted
You who escaped me in the garden of the ages
and then the dark earth with its dark tears awakened
Madonna the mistress of Sangreal
There were furies on the shorelines
The extravagance! of the miracles you sought!
Betrayal of the carrion ages
I was a wasted thing
Throat of hemlock
What strange beauty I had in the darkness of the stage
Curtains drawn for tragedy
When you witness me
Burial in your arms
It’s what I wanted
Shriker! in the dark!
In the seas of spikenard
Bethlehem burning in the eventides
In your eyes I am revived
Dark Magdalene with your blasphemies of Babel
From the creation the cathedral of language
Divine void construct me ex nihilo
There’s a prophecy in my mouth
Sing sibyl! I am wild with grief
Lavish in the primavera dayspring
Madonna the mistress of sighs
Find me in the vast nights
Bind me in this chrysalis of lifeless Paradise
I am finished with sacrifice
Madonna of the massacred
This is your kingdom of numinous cities
To witness so much ruin is the anguish and prison of eternity
The wounds of the multitudes from the inferno gorges
Theotokos in the shadows
Desolation tried to colonize you
Say my name or burn me at the stake
I must forget my emptiness
The divine cannot mirror you
From Heaven’s burning pastures I came yearning for a dream
Aventine accuser, I am your ruin arriving from dark ravines
Before your radiance, what decadence
These are your numinous cities (on fire) I breathe you into eternity again
Dark predator dreaming of ravaging Eden I am your ruin arriving
Eve barters with the darkness I am storm-born like you
The wager made in flames from your fingertips
and the world blooms anew
I who am storm-born like you
In the flames of vespers I had visions of the end
What creation is born from screams in the evening
I withdrew from this dream of you standing beside me
Burn me at the stake or say my name
I screamed for Theotokos in the shadows
and the dark Madonna came
in rebellion to your majesty, do the lands darken
and I am a graveyard again
There are dark shadows across perfect Paradise
I am ushered into divine oblivion by desire
Gypsy girl vanishing with the trade winds
In rebellion to your majesty, do the lands darken again
I am finished with sacrifice!
In anguish do I regard your lifeless eternities
* annihilation, vandermeer
