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VERONICA RHEN

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Irreducible

Oh, I have suffered / With those that I saw suffer. Miranda in The Tempest

I was terrified of the things waiting for me 
The illusions were disappearing 
Killing me in a sequence of silences
Everything was rushing
It was too much for me
Firefalling like Yosemite 
Around the clock 
Tearing off flower petals  
I wish I could stop 
Wanting to possess beauty 
The fragility annihilating me every eve 
I grieved I grieved
Then I melted to eternity 
The spectacles 
Winnowing me 
Into singularity 
Accumulated light 
From the floods of daytime 
Limbs of light peeling my sleeping eyelids 
Wayless like the breaking days  
I couldn't survive the pillars of creation 
I was traveling sargasso seas
When the spectacles witnessed me 
Spawning sun in the dark stations of night
I was a newborn babe
With an inquiring gaze
Before the shockwaves
I flamed amazement  
Vanishing into territories of mist
I admit jealousy of infinity's edgelessness  
The Earth owes me nothing 
And still I wanted 
A cloud creature fearing descent
I made a transaction with the darkness 
Blossoming moon glow swallowing me whole 
A funeral for the planet 
I was at the wake 
For the vanishings
And I prayed
That the flowering jasmine spring 
Hadn't missed me 
I was a sorcerer
Classifying the fires 
Like an archivist of light 
I saw Carthage destroyed 
And I wanted more 
A Valkyrie of the warlights in succession
Like a rich man needling through the eyes of heaven 
I wanted impossible things to happen to me
Slumbering in the fever-furnaces of dream
It was existence like a leech that desiccated me 
I would not betray the sound and fury 
Epiphanies from the tempest 
And yes we were sleepless 
I was a gilded firebird on that horizon 
I would inject my blood
Into the veins of earth
Spin light with the Spinners 
Bear witness to that disaster 
Carthage was history 
I was a jewel of the earth
Before the grief reduced me 
Endowed with reason and I wanted to give it up
Siren of the night
Grief reduced me 
I was a bride of the disaster
The light was spinning
And I wanted it to Go! Faster! 
I was a silhouette of the sun 
Demons from the deep drumming 
Like a refugee of fire 
I was consumed by wounds 
A history of my being
And it was annihilation 
I saw the ocean surfacing in barricades of waves 
Like the last gleaming rays of day
And I needed mirages sustaining me 
It was too much 
Time like a scimitar 
A traitor even to idleness 
I was in the dust with the locusts 
Sleeping away eternity 
Reduced by grief
I would not betray the sound and fury
Epiphanies from the tempest 
And yes we were sleepless 

What seest thou else
In the dark backward and abysm of time? Prospero in The Tempest

tags: emotionally and physically unwell tonight, the fragility, can scarcely write
Saturday 07.05.25
Posted by Nika