I was a thing that was missing in my head I was a titan in my head I was frightened I was either unsurvivable or a divine thing I felt the victories of fire the passages of Time were incriminating it was divine to me to be witnessing a river of fire in the darkness of this wilderness a token of grace wasted on me what do we do with our lives! what now! why hide! we lived—don't say it was a coincidence—we lived yes I fear existence would Miss us dare I say it I think I was scared of it when that devastation visited us! the end of the world was decided dissolution found me decaying was like a gift to me what was the point of resistance the days I wasted and the days I say they wasted me you were going to destroy me well I was wasting willingly I surrendered myself to stillness I wanted vengeance to end us—yes we lived! I was drunk on it! We lived ! I was sick with it

The days were always beginning and ending I remembered and it ended me I longed for distant things I was always wanting and there was I grieving for what I don't know it was leaving me the violence of memory the violence was like a ghost to me yes I kept it close to me! everything was collapsing I wanted it perhaps dust and dust it was divine to me reality disenchanting I survived by dreaming do you fear it, the violence of memory? even decay was like life to me Desire burned like devastation in me it was hiding in me I survived by dreaming and when everything collapsed I wanted it perhaps ?